Friday, November 21, 2014

Feeling Useless?

My daily hour with God is not a time of deep prayer in which I contemplate the divine mysteries or feel a special closeness to God. On the contrary, it is full of distractions, inner restlessness, confusion, and boredom. It seldom, if ever, pleases my senses. Even though I do not feel God's love the way I feel a human embrace, even though I do not hear a voice as I hear human words of consolation, even though I do not see a smile like I see a human face, still the Lord speaks to me, looks at me, and embraces me there. The way I become aware of God's presence is in that remarkable desire to return to that quiet place and be there without any real satisfaction. And I notice, maybe only retrospectively, that my days and weeks are different when they are held together by these regular and 'useless' times. God is greater than my senses, greater than my thoughts, greater than my heart. I do believe that God touches me in places that are hidden even to myself. And I do believe that when I pray I am in touch with the divine presence reflected in my heart.
- Henri Nouwen, Discernment

Sabbath moments can also be defined as "useless" in the eyes of the world. In some ways, it is because in these moments we are. We hold ourselves useless in order to attune ourselves to the ways God is calling us to be useful and to recognize the ways we are being put to use by God. But we have to stay for a moment, un-busy ourselves for a time, in order to be ordered by that usefulness of God.

Give yourself a "useless" time with God today. It can be one minute or an hour, whatever you feel you need.

Consider your most useless moments. Where was God? What gifts does uselessness bring us?