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“The desert is a
dangerous place. Nobody goes there unless they really have to…” These are
the words that begin countless Godly Play stories. These stories share the
history of God’s people, where they came from, where they went, and most
importantly how God met them wherever they were, guided them, protected them,
and gave them a home. Surprisingly, or not so surprisingly, the wilderness
played a critical role in these stories of lost, wandering, and lonely people.
It was through the wilderness that God spoke; whether through a burning bush or
by the words of an angel near a rushing river. It is in the wilderness that
these people of God shed their past and entered into a new way of life, fully
reliant on the one true God.
Most of us have, literally or metaphorically, had wilderness
experiences in our lives. We have felt lost and lonely. We have felt the drive
to go out, away from everything we know, to begin again with a new start, a new
perspective. The gift of keeping these wilderness experiences metaphorical is
that no matter the depth of emotion you may feel, the rest is relatively
controllable. You can distract yourself with food, conversation, and the stuff
of life. But when you step over that boundary by actually, physically putting
yourself in the wilderness, you have chosen another layer of vulnerability. You
no longer have the safety of distraction, comfort of your bed, or control over
surroundings. You are lost, alone, and in even greater likelihood than before,
physical danger. Wild animals roam. Weather is unpredictable and
uncontrollable. Bugs are everywhere. Dirt is everywhere. It’s a different world
than the one we usually construct for ourselves. Yet, we are created for, and
even by, this very same wilderness.
This last July, I brought a small but courageous group of
five on a wilderness excursion, rightly called: The Journey: Personal Transformation in the Wilderness. This rite
of passage was developed by Pastor Joel Martyn for anyone 14 years old through
adulthood. This experience is a three-fold process. The first stage is
Severance. In this stage, participants reflect on where they have come from,
what has brought them to the experience, and what they will need to sever
themselves from in order to fully immerse themselves in the wilderness. Using
the story of Jesus being led out into the wilderness after his baptism, we
discussed and reflected on what it was we had to leave behind and what we
brought with us to the experience. We were given time to sit alone and write
out a list of all of those things. These lists ushered us into the second
stage, Threshold, as we threw them into a low fire - a sign of our readiness to
let go. From this point, after watching our paper turn to ash, we were led
one-by-one to areas where we would spend the next two days and two nights in
solitary with only water, prayer, and the Bible to sustain us.
This period of time was so intensely personal; it has been
hard for me to find words to fully express what happened. I can say that I
experienced what I had only previously read, straight from mystics of our
religious history - The Word of God kept me full. In this time, the word
“faith” took on a new meaning to me. Through the wilderness, God nourished my
faith. Through the ups and downs, the points where I thought I reached my
emotional and physical limits, the Spirit pushed me through, refining me with a
new inner strength. At the end of this Threshold stage, when I found myself
reaching a new limit of exhaustion and loneliness, I finally heard the call to
return to camp. I said goodbye to this new, sacred space I had inhabited for
the past 48 + hours, and trudged back down to camp.
We assembled back where we began, around the fire. After
some discussion, we were invited into the third stage of our experience,
Incorporation. When we felt ready, we stepped one-by-one over a line of fire
where we were blessed in the name of the Trinity, into our new life. And
finally, we feasted together. Fresh food filled our bellies. The joy of
fellowship filled our hearts. We were new people, grounded in a new personal
and spiritual strength, with no rush to be anywhere except right where we were,
with each other.
No matter how different the wilderness experience may be for
each individual; whether you join the next group on The Journey, or not, I know
with a clarity I did not have before that it is in the wilderness places that
God will find you. You will not be alone. You will be changed. Without
wilderness experiences we lose sight of ourselves, we lose connection to the
earth and each other, we forget our Creator, or God, who pulls us from the
ashes of our past and repurposes us for a greater future.
When have you been called, or even forced, into a wilderness
experience? How did God meet you there?
If you do not feel that you have experienced the wilderness,
what is keeping you from taking the steps necessary to enter the journey? From
what do you need to sever yourself in order to immerse yourself in the journey
God is calling you to enter?
If you are feeling lost in the wilderness now, what are the
limits you have reached? How has the Spirit pulled you through, even when you
couldn’t yourself? What do you need in order to cross the fire into
incorporation?
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